My boyfriend thinks I'm fat (1 Viewer)

[spell check]

I think neither of you two have a backbone.

quit generalising about invertebrates

 

[kartie]

i think to girls the weight issue is to guys the "muscle" issue
i'd purposefully point out hot arms or bodies when you're around him, "oh my god, those arms" and then don't make a blatant, i think you should tone up, more like a condescending "oh but I love your little arms" and make that you can put your whole hand around his upper arm in one go....

if that doesn't make him feel insecure............

 

[Jezzabelle]

edit: those who have gone out with someone who is not stereotypically smaller/bigger than you, did your confidence wear out over time?

i was just recovering from anorexia when i started going out with a guy in march.. he was gymnist body, like the ones you perve at when you watch the olympics.

anyways i went from 2kg underweight and to gain 6kg... and i'm trying on size 8 Roxy pants and i walk out of the change room and he says "woooah you need to lose some weight"
anyways i am size 8 and 160cm and even if he only made one negative comment back in june... i still remember like it was yesterday, even tho he's said billions of nice things about my appearance. so i cant imagine how you must feel when you get it a lot. ***NOTE: one neg comment BOYS even if it just slips out.. will be engraved in our memories and a thousand pos. comments wont erase that.***
i'm not with him anymore cos he moved interstate... but a very long winded answer is .. yes... i did get increasingly selfconscience, not cos he was a dick to me like your guy, but more because he was just so physically perfect and i felt inferior...
(hence my bulimia.. but thats another story for another day..)

 

[Jezzabelle]

i think to girls the weight issue is to guys the "muscle" issue
i'd purposefully point out hot arms or bodies when you're around him, "oh my god, those arms" and then don't make a blatant, i think you should tone up, more like a condescending "oh but I love your little arms" and make that you can put your whole hand around his upper arm in one go....

if that doesn't make him feel insecure............

oh and i have something on that... when the ex went interstate he said he had made a vow not to be with any chicks till he had gained 10kg of muscle. .. and that includes me.. so i agree here.. guys can get muscle obssessed just the way girls get fat obssessed..

tell your guy he looks scrawny and that your fav actors are Vin deisel, bruce willis... and watch fast and the furious and keep pointing out how big and muscle-y Vin's arms are and how good it would feel to be in such a strong embrace... lol... yeh start talking about those action movie actors that are beefcake and how they turn you on....

 

[Not-That-Bright]

..why take it so personal, if a guy says 100000000 nice things and 1 bad thing.. that was probably a joke since you're so SKINNY..
If he knew you had anorexia, then yea that was definately the wrong thing to say...
but you girls shouldn't expect guys to kiss ur asses all the time, if u really wanna be with a dude u can't expect him to be like that forever

 

[Jezzabelle]

..why take it so personal, if a guy says 100000000 nice things and 1 bad thing.. that was probably a joke since you're so SKINNY..
If he knew you had anorexia, then yea that was definately the wrong thing to say...
but you girls shouldn't expect guys to kiss ur asses all the time, if u really wanna be with a dude u can't expect him to be like that forever

i think i personal comment about my personal appearance IS personal..

 

[Not-That-Bright]

do you have to take it to heart so much?
'hey you're fat' - said jokingly towards his girlfriend because she's so skinny, trying to joke with her.
Her reaction 'what an complete asshole'.

Posts up on a forum about her 'asshole' boyfriend calling her fat, everything immediately thinks he's a prick... she hasn't even gone to him and talked about it, and yet he's a prick.

it's not right.

 

[hbk_ace]

do you have to take it to heart so much?
'hey you're fat' - said jokingly towards his girlfriend because she's so skinny, trying to joke with her.
Her reaction 'what an complete asshole'.

Posts up on a forum about her 'asshole' boyfriend calling her fat, everything immediately thinks he's a prick... she hasn't even gone to him and talked about it, and yet he's a prick.

it's not right.

YEA!! .

 

[Jezzabelle]

do you have to take it to heart so much?
'hey you're fat' - said jokingly towards his girlfriend because she's so skinny, trying to joke with her.
Her reaction 'what an complete asshole'.

Posts up on a forum about her 'asshole' boyfriend calling her fat, everything immediately thinks he's a prick... she hasn't even gone to him and talked about it, and yet he's a prick.

it's not right.

alright you asked for it:

THE BIBLE (NIV) James 3:3-10

" When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.
All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. "
edit: Words have the power to breathe life into people, they can also breathe death. You should be more careful with what you say. dont you think we live in a sick and twisted world if;
we more readily are accepting of others speaking insulting sarcastic, negative words said towards us, then we can accept a compliment?!?!
when someone compliments you, is it so rare, that you dont know wat to say? and it feels uncomfortable? that sucks. it shouldnt be like that, but thats the world we create by saying its ok to joke about other people....

 

[Not-That-Bright]

And girls are perfect?
listen... we do not live in 'heaven' we live in the real world, in the real world friends take a few little shots at each other, and joke around.... that's all it sounds like these guys were doing.

I'm sure the world should be better... and i'm sure we should compliment each other more often... but don't u think it's wrong where we live in a world where people can't accept criticisms from their fellow man? I mean shit... saying 'you're fat' when you're obviously not fat... how can you get so upset over that to say 'dump him'.

Doesn't make much sense to me.

 

[ujuphleg]

ok, i hate to say it, but the chinese are quite possibly the most insensitive of races when it comes to weight. They will always say that someone is fat, even if they aren't. They'll make comments like "wah!? So fat huh?!" and they'll say that to people who aren't fat, like you said, your only a 10-12 and trust me YOU ARE NOT FAT!!

I wouldn't worry about it. And if your boyfriend keeps up the comments, tell him to shove it where it fits.

 

[waitingforwhat]

you probably are

 

[waitingforwhat]

just kidding..

 

[timrie6]

OK, when your family jokes about him "being to small" and he laughs it off, say, in a really loud, sarcatic voice, "you should see his cock!!!"

hahahahahahahaha

 

[timrie6]

Maybe he just thinks your way ugly.

You piss me off

 

[steph@nie]

Well, my italian family is pretty bitchy when it comes to weight.. but that's not the point. Either put up with it because you love him etc, or tell him to stop it and tell him to tell his family to stop it... and if that doesn't work then i'd leave.

 

[hbk_ace]

hey i like to go out iwth an italian girl

and goin over to her place for dinner will just be like eating chinese food,.... but modified.


but to the thread starter, most italian friends i know all have traditional families. is ure family strict in terms of wanting u to date an Italian Catholic? and hey if u have cousins or bros i kind of a feeling ure bf would have a tough time from them

 

[Not-That-Bright]

I'm sorry timrie

hbk_ace: I've gone out with an italian girl too, her dad was like born in italy and still had pretty strong italian traditions.... it was so scary. He hated me... me being an aussie and all, i know how it feels to be a guy from the middle east trying to date an aussie girl or something, it felt so weird and... i felt so threatened =S

 

[steph@nie]

they're not all like that though!

 

[hbk_ace]

I'm sorry timrie

hbk_ace: I've gone out with an italian girl too, her dad was like born in italy and still had pretty strong italian traditions.... it was so scary. He hated me... me being an aussie and all, i know how it feels to be a guy from the middle east trying to date an aussie girl or something, it felt so weird and... i felt so threatened =S

middle east ?? huh??

well its true for the majority, in the end if u like someone and they do actually care about u and treat u right then i dont see why anything else should come in to it.